2/24/2011

The Lord’s PassionWhen he knelt in the garden, did he know I loved him? Could he see me crying with anguish in my soul? He clenched the earth in his hand. Knowing all along the suffering he was about to endure. When he saw how the guards would be laughing at him did he remember the times I laughed at others misfortunes. How could I face him tonight. He will look at me with sweat dripping from his brow. Blood will begin to appear. I cannot take my eyes off of him. I can see he is tired he is lonely. Will he remember the times I unfairly corrected my children because I was tired. He prays to the Father asking for this cup to be removed. No. This must continue as the Father has willed it so. Judas comes and calls out to Jesus. He opens his arms and kisses him on the cheek. How many times have I acted nicely to someone’s face only to gossip about that same person when they walked away. Am I Judas? Have I kissed you too? Tonight I must face you. I caused this. I see the soldiers mocking him. Hitting him. Yelling at him. He says nothing. Tears roll down his dirty face. Jesus can you see I am sorry now. I want to take back every cruel thing I ever did. I want to correct every hurt I ever inflicted on anyone. He gets up. You were taken to judges. People told lies to have you condemned. I lie. I judge others. I know you told us not to when you walked the earth. Why did I not listen. My heart has grown cold. I became indifferent to others. Am I in the crowd talking about you? Watching your suffering for entertainment. You remain silent. Everyone is yelling. They accuse you and you stand still. You don’t yell back. You don’t defend yourself. No. You just love. You are already forgiving us. I want to turn away but I must continue on. They are taking you to be scourged. Jesus I cannot find words. My heart aches for you. I know I have sinned with my flesh. Am I a guard holding the whip? What difference does it really make? I am no better. I may as well whipped you. It is my sins that brought you here. Oh world. Can you truly continue with your sins of the flesh now. Holy Spirit give me the gift of fortitude. Help me to continue on. I know what is coming next. I cannot bear this. How could I suffer from pride. When did I become so self important. A crown of thorns was woven for you. My King. You look at me. I see the blood trickle down your forehead. I want to run. Hide. Your eyes speak to my soul of love. How can you love me. I have done nothing to deserve your love. Your crown should be magnificent. Pearls rubies diamonds gold. Not thorns. 
My daughter I wore this crown with love. Your beauty lies inside your soul. Look how you weep. Look at your sorrow. My mercy is greater than your sins. This is how much I love you. This is the crown that freed you from your pride. There is no suffering that is too great. The value of your soul cannot be understood. I love you. You are mine. I forgive you. The moment you were sorry I forgave you. 
They placed a cross upon his back. The wood was heavy and rough. How can I complain about my crosses. They are not worth mentioning. Why can’t I remain silent and be strong. 
You have to trust in my providence for you. Give me your cross. I will carry it for you. I will make your burdens light. You forget to ask. You try to handle everything on your own. Pray. I am listening. I love you. Did you forget I am here. I am. Waiting for you to ask me for help. 
The nails were pounded into your flesh. How can hands that are made for love do such cruel things. I can feel my own hands burn and ache. I wish I could take away some of your discomfort. There is no position that will give you relief now. Your mother is here. Quietly weeping a mothers sorrow. She is so beautiful. Words cannot describe her. She never takes her eyes off of you. She has joined you with her love. Each breath leaves you gasping for the next. Yet you still utter a plea to your Father. You say forgive us. We did not know what we were doing. Jesus, we knew we were sinning. We became so indifferent to your cross. I just didn’t realize how sin caused such suffering. 
My daughter. You do not know the price of your own soul. If you did you would never want to sin again. That is why this world needs my mercy. Everyone has fallen asleep. Where is everyone? What are they doing tonight? You try to comfort me. But where are your brothers and sisters? They do not realize what little time is left. I will come when you least expect it. You must guard your soul. There is no greater treasure you possess. Be ready. Ask for my mercy. It will be yours. This sacrifice was the only ransom able to pay your debts. I love you. I have said to you. No sacrifice is too great for your soul. Be not afraid. Do not feel hopeless. I love you. I forgive you. You belong to me. Your seat is at the table. Stay close to my heart. Then you will stay straight on the path. 
My King took his last breath. He laid down his life for me. He laid down his life for you. 
My children my brothers and sisters. I love you. Stop looking to the things of this world to give you happiness. There is nothing here that will give you a second more to your life. Focus on the path you are choosing. Heaven is a choice you make everyday. Give me your “yes” today. I love you and you are mine. I am the good Shepard who laid down his life for his sheep. I know my sheep and my sheep know me. 

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